The Turbulence of LSI-EIE Duality

Many people sing praises of dual relationships. I have no intention of dismissing them entirely—sometimes they do settle into peaceful coexistence with mutual understanding and relaxation. However, the passion of strong attraction is usually absent. Instead, deep feelings are often replaced by mutual irritation.

I will share a few observations from real life on how LSIs live with their dual, EIE. I can clearly see pictures from the recent past right in front of my eyes. There is such a couple in my close circle: he is a LSI, she is a EIE. This woman is my peer, and her husband is slightly younger, but she is highly expressive in her emotions.

And how else does EIE express themselves? Through drama. Literally out of nowhere, over some minor detail, she creates a life drama.

One day, I was walking through a shopping mall. Suddenly she spotted me, ran out of a boutique, and shouted: "Oh, thank goodness, I need you so much! Come look at this short fur coat I’ve eyed! I don’t know if it suits me or not." Meanwhile, LSI was sitting nearby on a chair, scrolling through his phone. He seemed indifferent, as if this blizzard of emotions didn’t affect him at all. Anyway, we survived the situation and bought the coat.

We left the mall together, and suddenly she said, "Listen, I’ve been wanting to show you my garden for a long time. I need some branches cut down there." I have been doing gardening, tree pruning, and landscaping for a long time—it’s my hobby. It would have been awkward to refuse, so I agreed.

At the scheduled time, we got into the car. LSI arrived and brought his wonderful EIEess. Dressed up and beautiful, she sat in the front seat, while I sat in the back. She turned halfway to me, halfway to LSI, and began to vividly, emotionally describe how they used to prune this garden, what grew there, and what was happening in general. In short, the car was overflowing with emotions!

We drove on, and suddenly—a massive, theatrical outburst: "Don't you see?! Look, they are selling glass jars by the road!" Startled, he froze in surprise, turned his head as if waking up, and said, "So what?" — "What do you mean 'so what'?! The neighbor told us to check them out and buy some!" LSI shook his head, stopped the car, and reversed.

She didn't get out of the car; he did. She rolled down the window and began directing him: "Three of those, two of these, that many of those... Honestly, you can never be trusted with anything! Carry them more carefully, they’ll break!" A sea of emotions! But looking at LSI’s Suggestive function (Fe), I could see that he was incredibly comfortable in this. He was simply bathing in this ocean of feelings.

We arrived at the garden. The scene there was "take two." They brought a ladder. I pointed out which branches needed to be cut, and LSI quietly marked them with paint so he could neatly saw them off later.

EIE stood nearby below, stirring us up with emotions: either he was painting too slowly, or he was moving the ladder too slowly, or he rolled the barrel to the wrong place, or everything was going completely wrong. My head was already spinning. Noticing my reaction, she suddenly caught herself: "Oh, are you in a hurry? Let's drop everything, let's just drop everything and drive you back!"

Meanwhile, she gathered a huge amount of apples for me to take home. Afterward, we decided to have some coffee. We poured the coffee and sat down. Just then, a neighbor called our EIEess over, leaving LSI and me alone.

I was feeling quite conflicted inside. I thought to myself, "How do you even survive in this turbulent Pacific Ocean?" And he, as if reading my mind, said: "You know, our children don't visit us—they can't stand it. But I feel good. I often have such deep emotional struggles inside, states of fear, thoughts about how hard life is... How do you survive in this world? But she literally pulls me out of it. I don't care what kind of emotions they are—joyful or negative. The main thing is that they pull me out of that state. I get filled with this energy. Around her, I am literally like an attachment."

This is the dual relationship I observed between EIE and LSI. But I must tell you that harmonious unions here are truly few and far between.

The Flip Side of Duality is that EIE’s activating Se (the self-esteem zone) drives a need for proof and struggle. This often collides with LSI’s creative Se, creating a pairing defined not by peace, but by constant emotional intensity and clashes between two strong-willed types.

Children raised in such families become accustomed to this environment. It can harden them and build resilience, but it often comes at the cost of lowered self-esteem, growing apathy, and emotional numbness.

Source: O. Mikhevnina