Irina V. (1) (EIE) - Meditative states for inner nourishment

Now I understand that until the age of three, I was kind of not here — I was floating somewhere in different states, feeling good there, no one distracting me. I enjoyed it. And we lived in nature, outside the city — it was beautiful.

<...> I gave the impression of a girl “with her head in the clouds,” a bit otherworldly, strange, with an absent facial expression. Strange children are always targets of collective teasing. I remember my mother was irritated by my absent state. She’d scold me: “You're sleeping with your eyes open again!” But I felt good… I hovered somewhere between thoughts and feelings and enjoyed a state of inner peace. Now I guess something was happening to me — something hard to put into words. As if I was absorbing something from within, after which I could return to this difficult, harsh world and keep living. I think I spontaneously entered a meditative state — or maybe something else.